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Most people make the common mistake of just filling in their profile and forgetting about it, waiting for people to contact them. Sure, they may get some inquires and occasional questions, but they may not be aware of what you are looking for.
Be proactive and take your life into your own hands-after all who knows what you want better than you yourself. Understand what dating fundamentals are:
· The attitude must be right-change for the better and be positive.
· Spending all the waking hours at work or at home will not help you meet Mr. Right. You will just be craving for companionship. · Effort goes into finding Mr. Right-unless your Mr. Right is the mail man or pizza delivery boy. · What one needs is motivation --- overcome the lethargy and get going. · Forget the past and seek the future-aim to be positive I know rejection and break ups hurt and are emotionally wringing. · All of us have scars that smart stemming from broken relationships and unfulfilled dreams --- no one is spared-so stop moping and begin the search. · Look good and stand tall-and you will find that the world of men perceives you differently. · Get rid of the words "no" and "can't" from your vocabulary-adopt nothing is impossible and I can do this. · Fight negativity and single blessedness. · Reach out for the sky---fulfill your dreams. Prioritize your life-personal goals are as important as professional ones. · The entire world is full of opportunities-- just grab them.
Shrug that huge chip off your shoulder --- a large and important part of dating success is ATTITUDE.
Successful Ways to Tackle Dating Make an action plan. For example you can decide, must make at least 3-4 new friends by the end of 30 days. Always seek out people you are comfortable with-do not aim for men who seem to have stepped right out of a film---tall, dark, and handsome. Adopt relaxation methods - deep breathing, tai chi, or music, or gardening. If you remain calm and collected, you will be able to see the world more clearly. Activity groups are great for meeting like-minded people. Pursue an activity you like-biking, hiking, photography, poetry reading, pottery classes, cooking classes, or even therapy groups. Once you are a regular, the ice will break and you will find yourself making many new friends. Find topics one can easily talk about - the weather, traffic, bakeries, food, and music - all general interest ones. If you choose a specialty subject like say sculpture you may be excluding several people from participating. Only plan a date when you have identified a "likely" Mr. X and formed a friendship with him. Make all efforts to find out as much as you can about him. Plan a date down to the last detail - what you will wear, when you will return, what you will say, how you will position yourself as well as your hands. Be sure not to fidget it conveys discomfort. Take care - always inform a close friend or family member where you are going and with whom. Leave a contact number where you can be reached. Precautions have saved many lives.
Once you have decided that cyber dating is your path, sit down every day, or twice a week, or in the weekends and read profiles of men who have a membership on the site. Make a list of "probable men."
Then after a few days, read through the short listed profiles once again to make sure that your choice in the first instance was right.
If yes, then you must:
· Use tools like hot lists, smiles, virtual flowers, friendships, on the site to express an interest. One can choose to send a smile to a profile to say subtly I am interested in knowing you better. You can offer to send an e-mail if the person is interested and offer to accept "collect call e-mails." · Make contact by using information in the profile to break the ice, " I read that you have sailed the Florida Keys-I too went there three years ago and got caught in a squall!" Make the contact interesting it does not have to be-"hi, I am xxx, I like yyy." · Weave a little humor into the message - laughter makes many friends. · Show you are interested overcome shyness and fears to say, "I liked your profile-so please do read mine!" · Make messaging like a conversation - weave in questions as well as answers it must be a dialogue not a monologue. · Read up on the art of cyber flirting and conversation starters for the tired and weary. Be creative. · Progress by e-mailing one another and chatting online-try and find out as much as you can about the man, his lifestyle, experiences, hopes, and despairs. Try and keep your eyes and ears open to discrepancies-white lies, changed story lines, and so on. · If you are fairly certain you like the man, suggest a phone conversation - it is an opportunity to find out how he speaks. And, if you are astute, conversations and voice inflections can reveal a lot. · Once you are sure -then consider meeting the man in a public place if possible in a group. Read up on safety concerns in dating. Go ahead met the man casually and then progress from there. Keep in mind that every contact may not become fruitful. So you need to use your membership to the fullest and read profiles as well as contact possible men over a period of time until Mr. Right comes along.
It would be wise not to make decisions based on first impressions. Many a time, a person may turn out to be interesting once you get to know them. Men like women can be shy and inhibited-things change once they are comfortable with you.
Tips: · Women can take the initiative and contact a man. · Make use of the "search criteria" options offered by sites. If in doubt, use the help options. View the FAQ section; most commonly asked questions are answered here. · Statistics reveal that successful online daters view more than a hundred profiles each month. Don't be disappointed if you do not meet with immediate success. The key is to strive and always keep hope alive in your heart. · Don't just go by how they look, gain an insight into their character by reading their profiles and by asking relevant questions. · And once you are comfortable with a man you can even initiate the first phone call /meeting. Some men just need a nudge. · The 20:1 rule according to users is applicable to online dating---for every 20 profiles you contact you can expect to receive one response. · One can increase the chances by posting: o An eye-catching picture.
o Writing a one in million profile.
o By asking questions and revealing what you find interesting in a profile. If you adopt these strategies you can hope to double or quadruple your online dating responses.
While contacting people you will be wise to avoid: jocks, mamma's boys, and field players-otherwise you are headed for heartbreak.
Using chat is integral to online dating. It is a service one can use to get to know people. Use the facility but exercise caution.
· Before you join a chat pause a moment to observe -get a feel of the chat room, size up the chatters, follow the pattern of their conversations. And, only if you are comfortable join them. · Introduce yourself and say "hi" in a friendly way. · Avoid gossip and criticism. · Ignore people who are rude, lewd, and disruptive. · Use emoticons, SMS lingo, and audibles while chatting. Familiarize yourself with them. · You can select a certain day, time, as well as chat room in which to meet your friends. · If you become apart of a group or forum do welcome new people. Expand your group that way you will meet many more people. · Host a chat event. · Choose topics that are current, interesting, and attractive to all.
Online sites will have as members, all kinds of people---some are there just for fun, others are wackos, yet others are serious about meeting their true love, some join to pass the time and have no intention of taking the relationship forward beyond e-mail friendship.
It takes all kind to make the world but most people come to online sites to find a date and make a connection with like-minded people.
Make an effort to look for people with similar needs to yours. Don't answer profiles that are looking for a casual relationship or describe a "Baywatch" babe as their ideal woman.
Make at least 2-3 phone calls before progressing to a meet the person date.
The keys to being a "hit" are:
· Write e-mails that are friendly and positive.
· Don't mention the past.
· Never come across as arrogant or a snob.
· Never mislead your dating prospects.
· Be candid, friendly, and honest.
· Project yourself in a "good light." Best Dating Around the World |